This time of year is always depressing for me. All the political correctness, commercialism, and the awkward sense of compulsion to buy gifts out of obligation instead of love always get me down. I feel like Charlie Brown felt, when he said, “I almost wish there weren’t a holiday season. I know nobody likes me. Why do we have to have a holiday season to emphasize it?”
I am feeling even more depressed than usual this year because I recently lost a close friendship over a bitter argument about a moral issue. I am angry, sad, and all torn up inside because what this friend believes in is very harmful to many people and it is oppressive to all God-fearing people. I have lost much sleep and skipped many meals over this. The fact that this friend claims the name of Christ makes it all the more troubling. I feel much godly sorrow for this friend and I am fearful that she will be under God’s wrath on the Day of Judgment. I hope that someday her heart will be broken so that she will not have to go to hell. Psalm 119:136 says, “Streams of tears flow from my eyes, for your law is not obeyed.” II Peter 2:7, 8 says, “if he rescued Lot, a righteous man, who was distressed by the filthy lives of lawless men (for that righteous man, living among them day after day, was tormented in his righteous soul by the lawless deeds he saw and heard)—if this is so, then the Lord knows how to rescue godly men from trials and to hold the unrighteous for the day of judgment, while continuing their punishment.”
I am also feeling depressed because of the weight of my own sin. My anger has crossed over from righteous anger to sinful anger many times because of this wickedness that my friend believes in. That is one reason that I decided to put an end to the friendship (she probably wouldn’t have wanted to continue the friendship after what I said anyway). “Do not let the sun go down on your anger.” I haven’t been keeping that commandment very well lately. Various sins are more tempting to me now because they temporarily alleviate my emotional pain associated with my anger, sorrow, and separation from this friend. I have gone back and forth many times in mind about whether or not it would have made any difference if I had said things in more loving way, quoted some more scriptures, explained things more clearly, or left out some things that weren’t relevant to the main issue. I rewrote in my mind the last two letters I sent to her hundreds of times. I wonder if I should have said more before cutting her off for good. Maybe I was selfish, wanting to get it over with so that I could get over the pain sooner.
I have, however, found some things to thankful for in all of this.
I have learned that I should hold my tongue (actually, not pressing the “send” button on an email) while I am in a state of intense anger. I know now that I should take several days or even several weeks to cool down and think clearly before responding to something like this.
I am not sorry that I stood up for what I believe in. This is something that I have not done very well in the past. This experience makes me even more determined reach others with the real Gospel of Christ in opposition to the hollow, watered-down, feel good, apostate religion of outward appearances.
I have hope that someone reading this article will be edified.
This trial has given me certain insights about why certain passages of Scripture are adjacent to each other. Some examples include verses 19-20 and 21 in the first chapter of the book of James and verses 21-22 and 23-24 of Psalm 139.
Many Christians teach that people have a void in their lives and if they would just “accept Jesus” then he would fill it. In reality, people who are not saved usually do not feel any kind of spiritual void, unless something very bad has recently happened to them. But there is a way to reach such people even if no such “bad thing” ever happens to them.
I am here to tell you that Christians do sometimes feel lonely and empty. Becoming a Christian does not instantly make everything all better, followed by living happily ever after. We expect to have trials, tribulations, persecutions, temptations, and godly sorrow for those who are not saved. Jesus said, “Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” (John 14:27) That is hard for me to do right now.
Like the late Peanuts cartoonist Charles Shultz, I can see myself in many of the Peanuts characters, like Linus, for example. To explain the real meaning of Christmas to Charlie Brown, Linus read Luke 2:1-14, which says at the end, “...peace on earth and good will toward men.” Romans 5:1 indicates that God does give the believer peace in the midst of his troubles, but it is peace with Him (so that he is no longer under His wrath as he was in his unbelief). It is not peace with the world. I long for the coming of the Savior and to finally be free from the influence of this wicked world system. The Resurrection of Jesus is the hope that keeps me going. It proves to me that he has triumphed over the world. It is what gives me peace.
As a Buddhist, I cannot speak for Christianity, but as an outside observer, I've found that Christianity has gone from being an accepting and ecumenical way of life to a restrictive and hateful religion. Gone are the days of Martin Luther King, where Christians were not afraid to stand up to even other Christians and preach love and acceptance. Now Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson have hijacked a previously peaceful and loving religion, and have preached hate for gays, liberals, Muslims, and a few have accused me as a Buddhist, of being in league with Satan.
ReplyDeleteJudging from this blog, you guys are simply part of the problem.
Thank you your comments. What in particular, do you think is hateful about what we are saying?
ReplyDeleteAs for being "restrictive", we simply believe that God knows better than we do. We "do not lean unto our own understanding" as our Bible teaches. Look at www.needgod.com for more on this.
Concerning gays read:
http://agoodchoice.blogspot.com/2006/06/god-created-man-in-his-own-image.html
Concerning people of other religions, I believe that some are God-fearing as we are, but all need to accept Christ for salvation. Don't be mad at me for saying this--Jesus said, "No man comes to Father but by Me."
We do not believe in forcing people to become Christians, but we do not believe in tolerating every kind of wickedness either. To us, love does not mean tolerance, but rather helping to free people from the bondage of (often addictive) sins. We are against any attempt by the government to hinder us in doing this. We are against giving people incentives to sin (such as gay marriage).
MLK did not believe in acceptance of homosexuality. Segragation and racism have no Biblical basis.
I don't pay much attention to what Falwell says. But I know that I disagree with many things that Robertson says. For example: he said that the U.S. should assassinate the Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez. He tells people on his program (700 club)that if you give him money that you can receive a guaranteed healing or be delivered from some other crisis. He has no scriptural basis for doing this and I assume that it is dishonest. I would not vote for him.